Relationships are tricky affairs that at times leaves us wondering what they are really made of. Divorce cases piling up in court shelves each day. What became of marriage? Is it that life has become so demanding or lifestyle changes have had a negative impact on the society. We spend so much energy on how to get ahead in life that we barely have strength left for our relationships. Here are few tips you could try to help reduce the number of divorcees in the society.
As much as your woman would want you to be macho, she would appreciate some gentleness when you are around her. She loves to see your emotional side. Tell her ‘ I Love You’ when she least expects it. Wink at her across the room or the dining table. Smile when your eyes meet. Text her when she is seated or sleeping next to you and watch her face glow.
This is where most of us are guilty (even the ladies). I understand you encounter lots of pressure at work and when you get back home, all you want is some rest and peace of mind. There is one more important thing though, your MARRIAGE. Learn to separate work from your marriage. If you have a housewife, don’t forget she missed you, she has some chitchat to share with you, she wants to share a laugh with the man she adores so don’t go back home and sink into the couch and start watching those boring political debates. Talk to her, enquire how her day was you will be surprised how the bond between you will grow closer and stronger … be her best friend and companion.
Often we hear phrases like, ‘women are like kids….’. That’s the delicate nature of their feminity. To be a good partner, learn what a woman is made of, her emotional needs; mood swings that mostly occur due to hormonal changes. There are times that she will just keep quiet intentionally, she wants you to reach out to her, she wants to feel desired, she wants to know if you still care so don’t ignore her, it will make her resent you, so strive to anticipate her every emotional needs as a woman. They are wired different from men.
Whatever happens, your woman expects you to always stand by her side. Never humiliate or ridicule or even criticize your woman in public how ever tempting it could be, it’s totally wrong and UNACCEPTABLE! There are times she might go overboard in a public spat but DO NOT join the public in condeming her. Defend her even when you know she is wrong but don’t forget to sit her down and make her understand that you didn’t also approve of her actions and insists that she apologises to the offended party.
This is the ‘creme de la creme’. Honesty is something so rare but very major. It’s the source of conflicts and winding up of most marriages. This is the pillar that sticks relationships together like glue. There are times we keep some secrets with the belief that she will never find out, only for it to come and haunt you ten years into the marriage. What a loss! If you sired a dozen kids out there, be man enough and let her know. This will avoid future conflicts, though it’ll hurt but it’s better than her finding out ten years into marriage. Try as much as you can to be transparent in your moves and dealings with her.
When meeting new people or just going about our business, most men are humble, respectful and act like perfect gentlemen to total strangers ( I don’t mean it’s wrong or you shouldn’t do it) but back in the house, to the woman you swore to love and cherish, they do the opposite; rude responses and all manners thrown into the wind. Style up my friend. What became of the manners you had during courtship? Get back to when you first met, she is still that same lady. The beautiful Princess. Your sugar pie. She will love you forever and ever…
Men this is where you will sweat it out. Better loosen that tie and belt, probably you might want to remove your shoes too. Guys, I know the idea of generously parting with that hard-earned cash ain’t easy. Deliberately we have fitted our wallets with Omata Speed Governor when it comes to house matters. Like seriously? Why don’t you do the same with your friends at the bar, kuchafua meza. At home, you need bedsheet changes, wall hangings, table mats, utensils and much more. If you can’t give her enough money to buy them, where do you expect her to get them? Unless you want her to get them from another man (after you know what). So at the end of the month make sure you give her enough money to run the house. She buys you new pair of socks, boxers and handkerchiefs, what else do you want. If you can’t handle a family, don’t marry. Period!
Posted by Mr. Jagweng